Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Getting Honest

I have come to the conclusion that I cannot hide the truth any more. I'm suffering from a common affliction for most men but it's something that we hide because we feel that we have to hide. I'm coming out of the closet, so to speak and I hope you, my loyal fans will not abandon me at this time of need. This is a really hard thing for me to tell the truth about because it affects every part of my life. You see those commercials every day and you never think it's going to be you. Especially when you're young. But some days, it's just the way the cookie crumbles. You see, I, like most sixty year old men suffer from erectile dysfunction. I know. It's incredibly rare for someone my age who isn't a complete waste case, and honestly, you all know me. I only drink on weekends and I never drink and drive. It's too easy to just ask someone for a ride. My case is very rare and delicate and the thing is... I could probably live with it, but you know, I have entered into a program to save sex trafficked women and it's too important for me to not have the full use of my penis. I have been asked to go undercover as a pimp in Russia and I can't be impotent. It'll blow my cover. Those poor women are counting on me to be fully upright. Who knows when I will need to be erect. I just found out there is a drug trial that starts on Monday and I have been accepted. It's risky but the chances of recovery are incredibly good. About ten percent of participants are able to achieve spontaneous erections after continued stimulation, drug therapy and a regimen of buddist chanting. It seems the throat vibrations really stimulate the penis. I hope you will stand by me and not judge my hardships. I have to be there for the women. They might want to do more than talk after a few months.

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